Friday, March 27, 2009

ups and downs

I climbed a mountain! How appropriate. Two strikes, and a home run on the third attempt. I'm content with it. I'm not going to tell you what mountain, but it was big. Bigger than the others. I hired a guide, and without him I would've failed undoubtedly. Actually the trail wasn't even marked so you'd have to be pretty amazing to do it without a guide. I'm glad I didn't summit before, because I think the lessons learned in the failed attempts are more worthy than this most recent success.

On the down side, I didn't make the first round of offers for Ryerson's Public Policy program *sad face*, though I may make the next round of offers. Anyhow, I'm owning up to the reality that I'm not quite as hot as I'd like to be in the eyes of academia. I'm definitely working through feelings of insecurity about the future... buuuutt, I know this is a good thing. God's got a plan, and so far it's been unfolding well for me, one piece at a time. There's a mixture of disappointment that my plans may not work out, but anticipation and a bit of excitement to see what He has in store.

Judge not the Lord by feeble sense
But trust Him for his grace;
Behind a frowning providence
He hides His smiling face.

His purposes will ripen fast,
Unfolding every hour;
The bud may have a bitter taste;
But sweet will be the flower.

William Cowper, "God Moves in a Mysterious Way" (1774)